NFL: Patriots Are 9-2; All I Care About Is Cheese

Even though starting running back Josh Jacobs was out for most of the game, much to the dismay of fantasy managers everywhere, the Green Bay Packers finally scored at least one touchdown in the first half and added more in the second to beat the three-game-winning New York Giants. The Giants were led by Jameis Winston at quarterback, and boy, does that guy love football! I loved watching him sing Hamilton in his pre-game interviews and was even happier to see Green Bay come away with a win in the greatest city in the world.

Jacobs wasn’t the only injury the Green Bay roster suffered. Jordan Love, the Packers’ quarterback, took a hard hit to the shoulder, and Malik Willis came in for a brief but impactful stint—throwing a touchdown! That definitely lit a fire under Love and LaFleur to get the offense moving. The Packers and their fans really needed that win.

The Rams and possibly the Patriots (who have the best record in the league as of this writing) are still the teams to beat.

Football is still so violent, and we don’t talk about it enough.

NHL: Edmonton Is Back at It

The Edmonton Oilers are off to a scorching start this season with Connor McDavid and Leon Draisaitl forming one of the most dangerous duos in hockey. Meanwhile, the Boston Bruins continue their dominance in the East, and the Vegas Golden Knights are proving last year’s Stanley Cup run was no fluke. The NHL season is heating up just as the weather cools down.

NBA: Everyone Is Getting Their Cellphones Taken Due to the Cheating Scandal

The NBA’s phone confiscation saga continues to dominate headlines as the league investigates the widespread cheating scandal. Players and staff across multiple teams are having their devices seized for analysis, and the tension in locker rooms is palpable. Some players have voiced frustration over what is an invasion of privacy in their eyes, while others support the league’s efforts to sustain competitive integrity.

Beyond the scandal, the season itself is delivering drama. The Boston Celtics are looking dominant early on, with Jayson Tatum and Jaylen Brown once again forming one of the league’s most lethal duos. And can we talk about Victor Wembanyama (Wemby)? The Spurs rookie is living up to the hype and then some. Every game he plays feels like appointment television (even though, sadly, he is injured now). The future of the NBA is in good hands.

MLB: Hot Stove Season Is Officially Upon Us

The NBA isn’t the only American sports league with a cheating scandal. Two Cleveland Guardians pitchers, Emmanuel Clase and Luis Ortiz, were accused of tipping off bettors to specific pitches, including their speed and whether they would be balls or strikes. Prosecutors say the bettors used this information to make hundreds of thousands of dollars, which is still significantly less than the pitchers’ contracts. MLB later said it would not ban, but only limit, the single-pitch prop bets that enabled this scandal.

In other news, hot stove season is officially here! Josh Naylor, first baseman and Canadian-born legend, re-signed with the Seattle Mariners on a 5-year deal. Hot stove season also means awards season. Shohei Ohtani won NL MVP for the second year in a row—and in both years, he’s also won the World Series. So yeah, good for him. Aaron Judge won the AL MVP. The Pirates finally have one shining star, and he won the NL Cy Young (best pitcher award). Congrats, Paul Skenes. He’ll get a bobblehead commemorating the feat in April. Tarik Skubal won the AL Cy Young for the second year in a row. Congratulations to him as well. Let’s get ready for more signings and offloading this “off season.”

F1: Oscar Piastri Gets His Haircut by Charles Leclerc’s Mom and I’m Jealous

Seriously though, how cool is it that Charles Leclerc’s mom is cutting Oscar Piastri’s hair? The F1 paddock feels like one big family sometimes, and these behind-the-scenes moments remind us that even elite athletes are just people who need a good trim. Oscar’s been having a stellar season with McLaren, and apparently his hair game is on point too. I’m officially adding “get a haircut from an F1 driver’s mom” to my bucket list.

Hot takes and hot cakes in your kitchen? Comment below.

Cheers,

Sarah